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in a service economy

March 5, 2009

Training for telephone representatives at health insurance companies:

Requirement for Hire
Must be able to say your name so quickly, the subscriber will never hear/understand it

Lesson 1 – Beginners
How to question a subscriber extensively before shifting responsibility to someone else in the company

Lesson 2 – Intermediate
How to transfer the subscriber without sharing any information already collected

Lesson 3 – Advanced
How to reset the deductible as often as possible, limiting subscriber benefits until it’s hardly worth it for them to pay premiums

Final Exam
How to give subscribers the complete shaft, repeating yourself until they are sobbing in frustration on the other end of the line


Guess how i spent my morning.

Even on the “worst” day — when the words won’t come, or they do come but they don’t work, when the plot stinks and the characters are flat, when my confidence whimpers in protest — even THEN, writing is better than wrestling with insurance companies.


listening to: Trick Pony, Pour Me (and feeling better already)

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